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Landlord Manual?
November 22, 2007There’s no reasoning with landlords, this we know to be true. They come as they please, and have an inexhaustible supply of excuses. In my seven-year interaction with landlords, I’ve yet to meet one who does not have a ready explanation for everything, from leaky ceilings, creaky stairs, and knobs that come off as you open the door. Landlords are so eerily alike I suspect they underwent a training of sorts to prepare themselves for a lifetime of rent collection. That, or they read the same manual.
I wonder where one can get a’hold of this manual. It must be a very interesting read. Imagine how the first chapter would go.
Chapter 1
Landlords should maintain an adequate supply of lifeforms, such as rats and roaches. The minimum acceptable rat to tenant ratio is fifty to one. The ratio for roaches to humans should be exponentially higher. Should this arrangement displease your tenant for some reason, ignore the tenant. Tenants complain over everything. This is why they don’t amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world.
Hmm. This is fun. Maybe I should write a manual for my landlord.
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